New Rules Of Social Media - Funny

New Rules Of Social Media

Bura Mat Type Karo
Bura Mat Like Karo
Bura Mat Share Karo

Humne Izhar-E-Ishq Kar Diya Mobile Par

Humne Izhar-E-Ishq Kar Diya Mobile Par,

Humne Izhar-E-Ishq Kar Diya Mobile Par,

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Lakh Rupaye Ki Baat Ek Rupaye Mein Ho Gayi

Pappu Rocked, Facebook Shocked

Pappu Bar Bar Apna Facebook Ka

Password Bhool Jata Tha

Usne Socha Main Facebook Ka Pasword

Kya Rakhu Jo Kabhi Na Bhoolu 

Usne Password Rakha"INCORRECT "

Ab Jab Bhi Wo Galat Password Enter Karta

FB Use Khud Bata DetI

Ur Password Is "Incorrect"

Pappu Rocked, Facebook Shocked

Funny SMS - Happy Independence Day - 2012

Aazaad Bharat Ke Nalayak Naujawano, 

Agar Aaj Valentine Day Hota to Inbox Full Hote

Chalo Ab Jaldi Uth Jao Aur Wish Karo Sabko, 

Happy Independence Day - 2012

Tera Mera Viah Ho Gaya, Mainu Raati Supna Aya C

Tu Baahi Choora Paya C, Main Sir Sehre Ban Ke Aya C

Tera Mera Viah Ho Gaya, Mainu Raati Supna Aya C

Meeh Tere Pind Pai Gaya

Ni Chaulan Da Jagg Mitran Ne Kita

Meeh Tere Pind Pai Gaya

Meri Google Wargi Soch

Main Kudi Computer Yug Di

Medi Badi High Approach

Main Busy Rehni Aan Chatting Ch

Meri Google Wargi Soch

New Girl Friend Needed - Fill This Form

New Girl Friend Needed - Fill This Form Please

Garmi Ch 3 Gallan Aksar Vekhan Nu Mil Diyan

Garmi Ch 3 Gallan Aksar Vekhan Nu Mil Diyan,

1. Paseena Bahut Aunda,

2. Light Bahut Jandi Aa

3. Te Mummy Di Awaz Sunan Nu Mildi Aa," Kanjor Je THANDA Paani Peeta C Te Botlan Thodi Maa Ne Bharniyan Ne"........

After Valentine's Day

After Valentine's Day

15th Feb:-Slap Day (disooooom)

16th Feb:-Gift wapas Day

17th Feb:-Ladai Day

18th Feb:-Manane ki koshish Day

19th Feb:-Break-up Day

20th Feb:-Dusri labbo Day..

Funny Baisakhi SMS Free | Funny Baisakhi Shayari

Pati: Film vich raat ek chudel kadi mere agge, te kadi mere pichhe si.

Patni: Kehdi film si?

Pati: Apne vyah di movie si.

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What is the height of telling a lie?

A negro telling his girlfriend, "tenu kaala chasma jachda hai, jachda hai gore mukhde te".

Enjoy the colorful festival of Baisakhi.

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Paani mein whiskey milao ta nasha chadta hai.

Paani mein Rum milao to nasha chadta hai.

Paani mein brandy milao to nasha chadta hai.

Saala paani mein hi kuch gadbad hai.

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Suraj se achha tara koi nahi,

Jaisa hai rishta humaraa dusraa koi nahi!

Chahe saari duniyaa me dhund lo.

Mere jaisa pyara, aur tere jaisa aawaraa aur koi nahi!!

Baisakhi Ki Shubh Kaamnayein.

Changes Make A Big Difference In Your Life

Changes make a big difference in your life,

This is my first poem, Hope all of you 'll like.

Changing a doctor , can help to get well soon,

Changing a leader , can help your country run smooth,

Changing a lawyer , can save your money ,

Changing profession, can change your earning,

Changing habits , can improve your personality,

Changing a place , can make you feel better,

Changing toothpaste , can make your teeth shine, :D

Changing beauty soap , can make your skin bright,

Changing shampoo , can stop you hair fall ,

And changing your thoughts , can make you more positive.

Changes for good reason, can change your life 

if you look forward for positive change :)
Writer:- Geeta Singh
Original Post Link

10 Ways to Propose to GIRL

1. Walk up behind girl and point fingers shaped like gun into her back "You're under arrest!" For what?

"For stealing my heart."

2. Hi, my name is Chance, Do I have one?

3. are your legs tired?

girl: Why?

because you have been running through my mind all day!

4. "I lost my phone number, can I borrow yours?"

5. Can you give me directions to your heart? I've seemed to have lost myself in your eyes.

6. Take a look at the tag on the girls shirt, jacket, etc.

She would say,"What are doing"

resond,"Oh, just checking to see if you were made in Heaven."

7. Pick up a flower and walk over to girl.

"I was just showing this flower how beautiful you are."

8. Is it hot in here or is it just you?

9. Walk up to a guy and say: "Are you from Greece?" "No" he answers.

"Oh, I thought all the gods were from Greece"

10. GEE I FEEL LIKE RICHARD GERE STANDING BESIDE YOU ........... PRETTY WOMEN.

O my sona

O my sona, 

i dont want you khonaa, 

i want a place in your hearts konaa, 

abto haan kardonaa, 

otherwise i will start Ronaa..

Funny Junk

Modern Art

Martial arts vs Modern art

STUDY

What is S.T.U.D.Y?

S=Sitting
T=Talking
U=unlimited
D=Dreaming
Y=Yawning,

So STUDY well

Oh god I have to STUDY more!

Umpiring Pregnancy

Once a man’s wife gets pregnant and is rushed to a hospital.
Unfortunately, the man was out of the city , when he got a call from the doctor to inform him about his wife.
He hung up but unfortunately he didnt know how to redail, so he tried to remember the number and called, the number was incorrect and went to an umpires phone(a man who keeps the score of a cricket match like a referee)
The man asked the umpire not knowing who was on the other line and said: “What is the condition?”, The umpire replied, “4 are out!”, “8 are going to be out soon.”

Birth Control Method

Positive Attitude

WHY WE HAVE SO MANY TEMPLES, IF GOD IS EVERYWHERE ?
A WISE MAN SAID : AIR IS EVERYWHERE, BUT WE STILL NEED A FAN TO FEEL IT .

SOLDIER : SIR WE ARE SURROUNDED FROM ALL SIDES BY ENEMIES ,
MAJOR : EXCELLENT ! WE CAN ATTACK IN ANY DIRECTION.

Funny

Ladke mandir kyun jate Hai,

kyonki vo ek hi jagah hai jaha

Aastha

Pooja

Shraddha

Aarti

Archna

Aradhna

Shanti

Jyoti

Karuna

Aur

Mukti

Milti hai.

Submitted By;-

ROHIT FROM LUDHIANA

HOW TO PERPOSE A GIRL......

Differant ways of proposing a girl....... In eng- will u marry me... In hindi- kya aap mere se vivah karengi... In punjabi- tere hathon hona hai aaj mitran da katal, tu lagdi hai sanu 12 bor di rafal, vekhna hai aaj asi khud nu tabah karke, AAJA VAJ JA BANDOOK DIYE GOLIYE NI SEENE VICH THA KARKE.

Submitted By;-

ROHIT FROM LUDHIANA

Funny Quotes

All short quotes and one-liners are automatically sorted by their rank. Hilarious quotes that suck will be deleted, so please vote if you think a funny quote sucks or rocks!

Friendship is like peeing on yourself: everyone can see it, but only you get the warm feeling that it brings.


The man who smiles when things go wrong has thought of someone to blame it on. - Robert Bloch


Time is a great teacher, but unfortunately it kills all its pupils ... - Louis Hector Berlioz


It's true that we don't know what we've got until we lose it, but it's also true that we don't know what we've been missing until it arrives.


Never take life seriously. Nobody gets out alive anyway.


There is a place you can touch a woman that will drive her crazy. Her heart. - Melanie Griffith


The only way to keep your health is to eat what you don't want, drink what you don't like, and do what you'd rather not. - Mark Twain


I told my wife that a husband is like a fine wine; he gets better with age. The next day, she locked me in the cellar.


Girls are like phones. We love to be held, talked too but if you press the wrong button you'll be disconnected!


The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think.

Text Scraps

Why is a bachelor skinny

and a married man fat?

-The Bachelor comes

home, takes one look at

what's in the refrigerator,

and goes to bed.

-The Married man 

comes home,takes one

look at what's in the bed

and goes to refrigerator!

===============================================

The poor wish to be rich

the rich wish to be happy

the single wish to be

married

and the married 

wish to be dead.

===============================================

Which type of girls 

wear transparent dresses?

The girls not having 

any confidence on

imagination power

of a man !

===============================================

Teacher to Bunty:

How old is your father?

Bunty:As old as I am

Teacher: How is that 

possible?

Bunty: He became father 

only after I was born.

===============================================

There was a lover

who said that he would go

through hell for her. 

They got married-now

he is going through hell !!

The average guy is
much more interested
in a girls Geography
than her History.

===============================================

A Husband:
There are only two things
about me that my wife
doesnt care about-
(i)Everything I say and
(ii)Everything I do.

===============================================

Bunty invested 2 lakh
in a business and suffered
a huge loss.
- Do you know
what was the business?
- He opened a
hair cutting saloon
in Punjab!!

===============================================

Man 2 Chemist:
Mujhe White colour ka
condom dena?
Chemist:White kyon?
MAn:Meri Padosan ka
pati mar gaya hai
mujhe afsos
karne jana hai.

===============================================

Why do women spend
so much time on
improving their LOOKS
and not their MIND?
Because they know that
men are STUPID
but not BLIND.

Angrez-Hamare yahan
80% shaadiyan
e-mail se hoti hain
Bunty- Kamaal hai!
hamare yahan
100% shaadiyan
female se hoti hain

===============================================

I'll take bricks and write
"I MISS U" on them
and throw it on ur head
to make u feel,
how much it pains
when "I MISS U"

===============================================

Cultural difference
between USA & India
In USA u can kiss at any
public place but
cant do SUSU.
In India u can SUSU
at any public place
but cant do KISS

===============================================

A Judge fined a rapist
Rs. 10,800
When the man asked
why Rs. 10,800?
Judge replied-
10,000 for rape plus
8% entertainment tax.

===============================================

A Sex expert was asked
whether rape is possible
while running?
No Chance!
Woman can run faster
with her skirt up than a
man with pants down.

Difference between
good girls & bad girls
Good girls open a
few buttons in
hot atmosphere, but
BAd girls open all buttons
to make the
atmosphere hot!

===============================================

Father on the day of
graduation ceremony
of his son asks him-
What was the
hardest thing u learned
at College?
How to open
Beer bottles with teeth!

===============================================

Who was the 1st Indian
woman 2 fly abroad?
********
********
********
Sitaji with Raavan.

===============================================

Man goes 2 medical shop
Man-I need poison
Shopkeeper-I cant sell u
(MAn shows
his wife's Photo)
Shopkeeper- Oh! Sorry!
didnt know
u had a prescription!

===============================================

For a Pepsi-
Shahrukh Khan,
4 a Fanta-
Rani Mukherjee,
4 a Coke- Aamir Khan,
4 a Thumps up-
Salman Khan,
Chinta mat kar Yaar
Kanche Waali bottle teri

Funny Sardarji Jokes SMS

SARDARJI bought a new mobile.
He sent a message to everyone from his Phone Book & said, ‘My Mobile
No. has changed.
Earlier it was Nokia 3310. Now it is 6610′

SARDARJI : I am Proud, coz my son is in Medical College .
Friend: Really, what is he studying.
SARDARJI : No, he is not studying, they are Studying him.

SARDARJI : Doctor, in my dreams, I play football every night.
DR: Take this tablet, you will be ok.
SARDARJI : Can I take it tomorrow, tonight is final game.

SARDARJI : If I die, will u remarry?
Wife: No! I’ll stay with my sister. But if I die will u remarry?
SARDARJI : No, I’ll also stay with your sister.

SARDARJI : People consider me as a ‘GOD’
Wife: How do you know??
SARDARJI : When I went to the Park today, everybody said,
Oh GOD! U have come again.. 

SARDARJI complained to the police: ‘Sir, all the items are missing,
except the TV in my house.’
Police: ‘ Howz that the thief did not take the TV?’
SARDARJI : ‘I was watching TV news…’

SARDARJI comes back to his car & finds a note saying ‘Parking Fine’
He Writes a note and sticks it to a pole ‘Thanks for the compliment.’

How do you recognize a SARDARJI in School?
He is the one who erases the notes from the book when the teacher erases the board.

Once a SARDARJI was walking. He had a glove only on one hand .
So the man asked him why he did so. He replied that the weather forecast announced that on one hand it would be cold and on the other hand it would be hot.

SARDARJI was in a bar and his cellular phone rings. He picks it up and
Says ‘Hello, how did you know I was here?’

SARDARJI : Why are all these people running?
Man – This is a race, the winner will get the cup
SARDARJI – If only the winner will get the cup, then why are the others running?

Teacher: ‘I killed a person’ convert this sentence into future tense
SARDARJI : The future tense is ‘u will go to jail’ 

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